Kenya (Robinson): Pomade in America

Recently, I was doing a photo shoot for Mizani—a L’Oreal division of products targeted to the African American hair salon/stylist—and I got into a conversation with one of the models, Kenya (Robinson) about the politics of black hair.  Kenya, it turns out, is from North Central Florida—an area I’ve been spending a lot of time in lately, doing research for my book about Thurgood Marshall.  But Kenya is also a “visual-conceptual-performance-artist” and she recently traveled around the country with her exhibit, HairPolitic, The Pursuit of Nappiness, making her an authority on the subject as far as I’m concerned.  Because she’s inspiring, opinionated, and full of life, I wanted to interview her about her work, and also get her take on the recent Publishers Weekly flap over their “Afro Picks” issue.

GK: What do you think about this Publishers Weekly controversy over this “Afro Picks” cover?

K(R): I believe, what is most fascinating about the imagery featured on the cover of Publishers Weekly is the ensuing discussion that is taking place.   It is a testament to how far black people must travel to reach a social-cultural space that lends itself to autonomy.  Unfortunately, our actions are often defaulted to the inherently political, eliciting responses that dismiss the selection as an editorial decision and concern themselves with an imagined ‘read’ from the mainstream audience.  So what if (white) folks view work by black authors as “cultish…voodoo…foreign”?  That perspective is entirely allowed and it doesn’t seem to be an absolute deterrent to penetrating new audiences.  In keeping with a political vein however, I vote that black folks continue to make work that is focused on the creative impulse and let the ideological chips fall where they may.

GK: So, who are you, where are you from and what are you doing in New York?

K(R): My name is Kenya Naila (Robinson) and I am from Gainesville (by way of Laundstuhl, Germany and Seattle,Washington). Both my parents are Gainesville natives as well; we’ve even had some of the same teachers, which illustrates the type of comforting redundancy found in towns like these. I’ve worked as a fashion designer, patternmaker, and graphic

designer, and I’ve also stumbled upon a number of copywriting projects- all of which serve to support my passion as an emergent artist/independent curator.

My move to New York (Brooklyn), almost 6 years ago, is a testament to a previously unrequited love affair with the city. I first visited when I was sixteen on a delightfully touristy trip with my father. All the things that imagined about New York City, from watching movies and television seemed to be true, and I felt a connection with all the possibilities that the big apple represents and, in fact, presents, to those willing to jump in with both feet.

GK: You told me you grew up in North Central Florida, and early on, you experienced reactions from whites about your hair.  Someone once called you a Pickaninny, you mentioned.  So you must have stood out there, even at an early age.

K(R): To be sure, I think I was seen as unique in Gainesville. Coming from Seattle Washington at age 7, I had a different way of speaking, so that was an easy characteristic to use as an identifier. This trait was racialized as soon as I went to public school (having come from the Montessori tradition). I have always been a friendly person, a talker, so I never had a problem expanding my friend circle as far as it would go. This behavior translated into the fact that most of my closest friends as a youngster were white girls, thereby introducing questions of beauty and difference early on. It wasn’t until high school that my social groups started to homogenize darkly. Because the University of Florida is so large, there are/were a number of international professional students with families, American faculty members and other folk associated with the university whose children I went to school with. Thinking back on it, I must have been viewed as an “appropriate playmate” since at the birthday parties, bar/bat mitzvahs, and sleepovers, I was the only black kid there.

In turn, I was always exposed to glimpses of a higher-end lifestyle only to return to “the eastside” (the black side) of town. Fortunately, I think I was more curious than envious of these differences. It was clear that black people were poor(er) and white people all lived in nicer houses and neighborhoods- even the ones you could identify as having ‘less’. This continues to intrigue me, especially in light of what I know and have discovered about the connection between racism and white privilege. I think my way of being as a youngster may have confused some of the significant adults in my life (both white and black). I believe each group– and make no mistake, these are generally very separate groups– they believe the hype so to speak. Both about themselves and the ‘other.’ Ultimately, though it has been the layered context of my upbringing that gives rise to much of my creative work, but I suppose this is consistent with most creative people.

GK: What is different about black hair in New York, as opposed to black hair in the South?

K(R): Fundamentally, there is nothing different about black hair in New York vs. the South. The rules are equally restrictive, albeit in different ways. The southern climate usually requires a more sculptural approach–gelled waves and coiffures hair-sprayed to a lacquered finish, are still the norm. While in the North, with its cooler weather, has traditionally allowed for longer periods between visits to the salon, and freer configurations. In my heyday, I went to the salon a minimum of twice a month, more if there was a special occasion. I woke up 5 am each morning during High School to arrange my hair into spiral curls that could easily be undone by the morning dew on my walk to the bus stop. I would often wear a shower cap through my morning commute to preserve my ‘do, and no one gave me a second glance (lawd!).

In New York there is this faction of militant naturalists that supply similar restrictions as to what is appropriate. To some, grooming (dread)locks at a salon is sacrilege and any type of artificial or chemical accoutrements is tantamount to ‘blackness denial’, while others eschew the long hair aesthetic altogether. Then there is the issue of weaves and wigs. The technology of weave installation seems to be on a higher level here, probably because the income of the patrons is higher, and these cutting edge techniques seem to trickle down more democratically in the North.

Both regions fixate on creating looks that require extreme care/up-keep, but I think this is a complicated mixture of tradition (take a look some the time intensive examples from west Africa) and a transformed aesthetic that is based on standards of mainstream (White) culture. Speaking of which- White people continue to surprise me with their lack of boundaries when it comes to Black hair. I have been approached by complete and utter strangers (male and female), with questions, and sometimes physical invasions of personal space, (in the North and the South), all in an effort to touch my hair (the nerve!). And it’s still an issue in the workplace, whether we wish to acknowledge it. What is most disturbing is that in almost every region of the African Diaspora, water is kryptonite to 90% of black women. Can you imagine? Being literally disabled by the thought of an impromptu dip in the pool, just because of your hair?

GK: What are you working on these days?

K(R): I feel like Black people in America (specifically) feel a sense of shame attached to the brutality of our collective history. I hope to inspire a sense of entitlement that comes from acknowledging our strength and recognizing our birth right to the American dream. I wish to inspire active questioning through my artwork. Whether it’s an address to the lucrative ambitions of the prison-industrial complex (or a visual investigation of the misrepresentation of women in mass media (White Bitches: The Platinum Eaters). There is a reason that Art can transcend language- I believe that I can help create a space to insert diverse voices into this dialogue.

I am very proud to be an LMCC WorkSpace resident, and the level of diversity expressed in this year’s class inspires me. Perhaps it is the ‘Obama Effect’, but more likely it is the culmination of all those struggles from before. I truly believe in the American experiment, even though, at its inception, it was not meant for a person like me. I am a member of the Hip-Hop generation, so the bragadocious co-opting of what ever I can get my hands on, and making it my own, is a cultural touchstone that has significant merit.

Technology through performance is yet another conduit I plan to ride until the wheels fall off. And the challenge of these serious economic times is a testament to the legacy I am helping to create.

To learn more about Kenya and her work, travel here…

Kenya (Robinson) at LMCC Workspace:

http://kenyaworkspace.blogspot.com

http://lmcc.net/art/residencies/workspace/2009/session/kenya-robinson.html

Online Portfolio

http://www.wotartist.com/art-website.asp?profileid=4781

The Professional Muse ~”Strategic Inspiration”

“Get Them Kids” by Kenya (Robinson)

http://www.vimeo.com/6690067

http://theprofessionalmuse.googlepages.com/home

www.facebook.com/TheProfessionalMuse

Barack Obama’s Afro Pick

This week, Publishers Weekly ran a cover story on “new books and trends in African-American publishing.”  Nothing unusual there.  Except the cover headline, “Afro Picks!” was illustrated with the image of dozens of fisted Afro picks packed into the hair of a young black woman.  Now, the publishing world is trying to figure out whether the trade magazine is guilty of anything beyond hackneyed double entendre.

Clearly, the Afro Pick still packs a political punch.  But I was reminded of a time, not long ago, when the Afro Pick packed a punchline.  In November of 2007, I attended a cocktail party/fundraiser for Barack Obama at a friend’s house in Harlem.  With no video cameras around, Obama was loose and clearly in a good mood as he gathered himself to say a few words before heading out to another fundraiser at the Apollo Theater.  Just then, he caught a glimpse of himself in a mirror and remarked that he needed to get back to Chicago and “get myself a haircut.”  At that point, the Afro-sporting author and professor Cornell West pulled from his pocket a large Afro comb and handed it to the Senator, who began to pick at his hair, much to everyone’s delight.

When the laughter began to subside, Obama paused and took one final look at the pick.  Then, with perfect comedic timing, he handed it back to the author.  “Brother West,” he said, “I’m disappointed.  I expected to see a big fist on the end of this!”

Aside from the aesthetics of PW’s cover, there seems to be a larger dynamic at play, as some African-American writers believe the magazine’s cover choices only serve to endorse the continued segregation and placement of their books in “AFAM” sections of bookstores and effectively limiting their commercial appeal.

As someone who is working on a book about Thurgood Marshall’s life in the years leading up to Brown v Board of Education, I’m sympathetic.   I’d prefer to see it not tucked away in the AFAM section of bookstores, but in American History.  Where it belongs.

Happy Birthday, X

It’s almost ludicrous to believe that Malcolm X would have been 84 years old today had he survived a shotgun blast at the hands of Talmadge Hayer at the Audubon Ballroom in Upper Manhattan in late February of 1965.  Before the decade was over, assassins would strike out at America’s most divisive and beloved figures, black and white, and no one had a bigger target on him than the man born as Malcolm Little in Omaha, Nebraska.  

After breaking with the Nation of Islam, Malcolm X began to speak of working with civil rights leaders, but his only meeting with Martin Luther King Jr. was brief–barely enough time together for a photo op.  There would be no photos of Malcolm X and Thurgood Marshall, however.  Malcolm X despised Marshall’s integrationist views and had been referring to Marshall as the “half-white Nigger,” in speeches at the Hotel Theresa in Harlem.  Marshall was not amused.  ”I’m about the same color he was,” Marshall told author Juan Williams for his book, Thurgood Marshall: American Revolutionary.   

The two met on Seventh Avenue in Manhattan one afternoon after Malcolm X had returned from Mecca, and according to Marshall, “we called each other sons of bitches and that was all there was.” Marshall told Williams that he thought Malcolm X had changed after the pilgrimage, but he still didn’t hold Malcolm in high regard.  ”What did he ever do?” Marshall asked, adding that Malcolm X “was a bum, hell, he was a damned pimp–a convicted pimp, about as lowlife as you can get.”  

Dirty New York

Shadows by John Cassavetes

 

A few years ago, I had a photographic assignment to shoot street scenes, buildings and locations all around New York City for a coffee table book, City in Time.    The point of the book was to compare, side by side, images of New York as far back as the 19th century, and attempt to replicate those images from the exact vantage point.  In some cases, the passage of time was obvious.  In others, little had changed.  

Taking of Pelham 123

 

 

 

It was an opportunity to look at the city I’ve lived in for the past twenty-five years in a different light.  New York as a visceral set.  But because the majority of the “old New York” images were taken before World War II, there was an understandable gap in the coverage.  With the old photographs in hand, I’d travel the city and painstakingly attempt to find the precise spot and the same lens needed to capture an image that matched the original.  Sometimes, new trees would make the job impossible.  Other times, new buildings got in my way.  And sometimes, everything lined up perfectly.

Kojak

 

 

My favorite shots were the ones that transported me back to those gap years, in the 1960s and 70s, when the city was grimy and rough around the edges. A city I remember from watching movies like Shadows by John Cassavetes, and William Friedkin’s The French Connection, and TV shows like Kojak. Or from childhood visits, where payphones, pimps and Plymouths littered the streets, and I’d peer out nervously from the back seat of our family station wagon, making sure my car door button was depressed as we rolled down Broadway.  

The Warriors

 

 

While shooting for this book I’d walk everywhere, and once in a while, I’d turn a corner near South Street Seaport or in Murray Hill and the drab signage of years gone by would instantly, if only momentarily, hearken me back to a time in the city that is indelibly and visually etched into my psyche. Sometimes it would be graffiti.  Or garbage piled up on a corner.  New York was definitely dirtier then and somehow got by on less advertising. But it was in color now–unsaturated, Kodachrome color with shallow depth of field, and it was terrifying at times.  Nobody thought to have block party barbecues during the blackout of 1977.  Son of Sam was lurking out there, somewhere, and Jimmy Breslin was on (and in) the story for the Daily News.  And somewhere, a detective slapped a cherry on the roof of a Plymouth Fury, and the tires screeched as the smell of smoke from a tenement fire in the Bronx permeated the air.  

Obamanominee? Get Shorty.

On the heels of endless evaluation of Barack Obama’s first 100 days in office (all concur, he was busy) comes the President’s first chance to select a Supreme Court nominee, and another news cycle that promises to be rife with speculation.  A Woman?  A Pragmatist?  The answer is yes. 

It’s no secret that Thurgood Marshall is one of Obama’s heroes. “I would imagine that if Barack had a free hand to appoint judges without having to worry about confirmations, about politics, that his idea of a great justice would be someone like a Thurgood Marshall,” said Geoffrey Stone, the former dean of the University of Chicago law school, in the New York Times. 

If anyone provides a link to Marshall, it’s Elena Kagan, the former dean of Harvard Law School. Obama nominated Kagan (who was recently confirmed) as the nation’s first female Solicitor General, a position that is sometimes referred to as “the 10th justice.”   Marshall was appointed the nation’s first black Solicitor General by Lyndon Johnson two years before Johnson named him to the Supreme Court.  

And if that link isn’t enough, after graduating magna cum laude from Harvard Law School in 1986, Kagan was a law clerk for Justice Thurgood Marshall, who, according to Kagan, called her “Shorty.”

Strange Fruit

Just before Brown v. Board of Education, Thurgood Marshall became involved in a dangerous and dramatic case that centered around the citrus industry in Central Florida.  White “citrus lords” maintained control over black labor with the help of local law enforcement and a sheriff’s department that worked hand in hand with the Ku Klux Klan.  It was a semi-feudal system that lasted for decades, and violence was often the preferred method to rid communities of troublemakers.  Sometimes, the burning of neighborhoods was necessary to impose control.  

Today, the orange groves of Florida employ mostly Hispanic migrant workers who provide cheap labor.  Last week, I was in Central Florida doing research and I came across one of the local groves, where I took this picture.  I’m not sure things looked much different when Thurgood Marshall was down here in the late 1940s, and I wondered what the Hispanics working these groves knew or cared of this historic and often deadly part of the American South.

John Hope Franklin 1915-2009

When Thurgood Marshall was preparing to argue Brown v. Board of Education before the US Supreme Court, he called historian John Hope Franklin and “persuaded” Franklin to join his legal team.  Marshall wanted a historian’s perspective on the intent of the framers of the Fourteenth Amendment with respect to segregation in the schools, and the NAACP attorney was able to transform Franklin’s research into an “urgent plea for justice” before the Court.  It’s rare that a scholar and historian is able to see the results of his own contribution to a moment that he believed, “reversed the course of history.”

On Wednesday, John Hope Franklin died at the age of 94.   Franklin was the author of From Slavery to Freedom (1947) which was a landmark book, integrating black history into American history at a time when most American historians ignored the treatment of blacks in this country. Franklin’s work is even more impressive when you consider that he was attempting to conduct much of his research in libraries and archives in the Jim Crow south, where buildings had no separate facilities for him to work, no bathrooms for him to use, and he often had to persuade staff to let him view materials in closet-like rooms away from white scholars.  

In his obituaries, John Hope Franklin is usually described as a scholar, historian or professor.  But you didn’t have to read too far into his books to see where his heart was.  ”One feels the excitement of hearing an untold story,” he once said. “We must go beyond textbooks, go out into the bypaths and untrodden depths of the wilderness and travel and explore and tell the world the glories of our journey.”

Gay for a day

I did a book event in Portland, Oregon the other day and what a thrill.  I was immediately recognized in the hotel lobby.  ”Sam?” the man asked.  ”Are you Sam?”

“No, I’m not Sam,” I said.  He looked at me in disbelief, then walked away. Not a minute later, near the elevators, another man approached.  

“Hey, Sam.”  Only he didn’t look happy to see me.  I told him I wasn’t Sam, but that somebody else thought I was, too.  

“Well, you must get that a lot,” he said.  

I told him I was from out of town, and he explained to me that I looked just like Sam Adams, the Mayor of Portland.   I went upstairs to my room and did a quick Google Image search and damned if I don’t look a little like the Mayor of Portland…..Make that Sam Adams, the gay Mayor of Portland…..Sam Adams, the gay Mayor of Portland who they are trying to run out of office for having a homosexual liason with a teenaged boy!  

I was bummed that Sam is a little better looking than me, too.  If you’re going to be a doppelganger, I think you always want to believe that you’re the more attractive of the two.  But Sam is more put-together than I am.  His hair is neater and there’s a nicer glow to his skin, I don’t mind saying.  It’s not too hard to guess which of us was able to land a young stud named Beau Breedlove.  (Not kidding.) 

An hour or so later, I shared an elevator with a middle-aged woman who got off on the same floor as me.  ”Are you staying here?” she asked, and I knew what she was thinking.

“You think I’m the Mayor of Portland, don’t you?”

She stared for a moment.  ”You do look like him.”

Later that night, I drew a few strange glances from patrons at the restaurant I was eating at.  It was a little unnerving, and it might be the only time I wished I looked like another mayor.  Any mayor.  Ed Koch.  Ray Nagin. Mayor McCheese.  I quickly ate my meal and left. But part of me wanted to do something a little wild in there and cause a scene.   Give the diners a reason to go into work the next morning, saying, “You should have seen the Mayor last night. He’s gotta go.”

Sam Adams, Mayor of Portland

Author, Doppelganger

 

Model Behavior

Models sometimes get a bad rap.  They make news for the ways in which they unwind after a hard day’s work, their use of cell phones and even their exercise habits.  On the bright side, I once did a shoot with Ivanka Trump, who spent time in the hair and makeup chair reading Ulysses by James Joyce.  Joyce!  And you never hear about her doing any court-ordered community service.  

Yesterday, I did some backstage shots at Patricia Field during New York Fashion Week for Gerlan Jeans where the talented team of hairstylists from Mizani was at work.  The styles were complex and the models had a lot of time on their hands.  But I was happy to see so many books being read.  Models may well save the publishing world.  Or at least, publishing in the former Soviet Union.  In truth, most of the models were Russians reading Russian books, and I was too busy to write down titles and author names.  

 

Some Russian book.

 

The Makedown by Gitty Daneshvari

A Greek novel

 

Sex and the City: The Movie by Amy Sohn

Another Russian book

Writer’s Block

Writers are known to do anything to avoid sitting down to work.  Some can’t stop cleaning the house.   Others play video games.  Or drink.  I like to make pen pals from around the world.  That’s how Benny came into my life. 

 Our saga begins with the usual promise of wealth…

 Dear Sir,

You will be surprise to receive this mail, because we have not met before or spoken on phone, but wee believe you will  be in the position to help us in our bid to secure this urgent and very important help from you. My name is Benny O. Bamaiyi the eldest son of Rtd General Ishaya  Bamaiyi who was the erstwhile Minister of Defence/Chief of army Staff in the late General Sani Abachas Regime of 1993-1998. I am contacting you in a benevolent  spirit, utmost confidence and trust to enable  us provide a solution to a money transfer of$46,500,000.00M that is presently putting my entire family into great disarray. I was convinced that you could be of assistance to me. So, decided to contact you at once due to the urgency required for us to immediately transfer the said funds out of the country.

During the time my father was in the government with the late General Sani Abacha as the head of state, they were both involved in several deals that yielded  Billions of Dollars. The prominent amongst the deals was monies that emanated from funds set aside for the importation of Arms and Ammunitions to boost the Nigerian  Defence funds set to embark on an overseas campaign to counter the United States action to put a stop to the self-succession bid of The Abachas government to retain power, and monies set aside to rehabilitate the ailing Nigerian Petroleum Refineries and the National Electric Power Authority which supplies Electricity to the entire nation. If you were conversant with world news, you would understand better During this period my father was able to make some good money for himself and kept in his private bank accounts.

The then head of state General Sani Abacha transferred his share of the money through a Lebanese businessman, Chagoury  and a Jewish businessman, Mark  Rissar to bank accounts  overseas. Unfortunately, all the secrets were revealed by the investigation agencies set up by the successive  governments  and most of the Abachas loots were traced and repatriated from the various accounts to the Federal Government Treasury out of the money my father made, he left the sum of N50 Million (Fifty Million Naira) in the CBN escrow account for further transfer into a foreign account and a sum of $46,500,000.00M (forty-six million, five hundred thousand united state dollar only) was kept in a Private security firm here in Nigeria. Through the confessions made by the Abachas Family, the N50 Million was recovered by the investigating agency from the CBN escrow account. But were unable to discover the $46,500,000.00M, which he kept in the vaults. The reason is because no names were used to lodge in the funds. Instead, he used PERSONAL IDENTIFICATION NUMBERS (PIN) and declared the contents  as Bearer Bonds and Treasury Bills Also the firm issued him with a certificate of deposit of theconsignments  Note that I have these information in my custody right now, my father has been arrested and detained for interrogation.

As the eldest son of my Father, I believe that I owe the entire family an obligation to ensure that the $46,500,000.00M is successfully transferred abroad for investment purposes.

With the present situation, I cannot do it all by myself. It is based on this that I am making this contact with you. I have done a thorough homework and fine-tuned the best way to create you as the beneficiary to the funds and affect the transfer accordingly, is rest assured that the modalities I have resolved to finalize the entire project guarantees our safety and the successful transfer of the funds. So, you will be absolutely right when you say that this project is risk free and viable If this proposal satisfies you and you are capable and willing to assist, contact me at once via email for more details. Believe me, there is no one else we can trust again. All my fathers friends have deserted us after exploiting us on the pretence of trying to help my father. As it is said, it is at the time of problems that you know your true friends so long as you keep everything to our self, we would definitely have no problems. For your assistance, I am ready to give you as much as 20% of the total funds after transfer and invest a reasonable percentage into any viable business you may suggest. Please, I need your assistance to make this happen and please do not undermine it because it will also be a source of up liftment to you also You have absolutely nothing to loose in assisting us instead, you have so much to gain.

Awaiting your urgent and positive response through my alternative email address bennyobaseki2002@xxxxxxz.com

Best Regards,

Benny O.Bamaiyi

 

Dear Benny,

I will consider this for 30%.  Please respond.

 

Dear Friend ,

I received your mail.Please understand that this is a family even though I am at helm of affairs,however after due consideration we concluded that we will give you 25% of the fund.Please consider this and send to me your full name and address your private phone and fax numbers to enable me forwaqrd them to our family attorney who will process the document that will be sent to you to empower you put claims to the fund on our behalf.Awaiting your your urgent response and due consideration of our new offer.

God bless

Benny

 

Dear Benny,

Thank you for your prompt response.  I’m afraid I must insist upon 30% if I am to undertake in this agreement.  I am at considerable risk, given these times, and in order for me to make the commitment to this agreement, I will need 30% of the sum mentioned.  Only then can I give you the numbers and routing information you request.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Louie

 

Dear Friend,

I have received yur mail once again.I want to assure you that there is no risk situation in this transaction so disuabuse your mind from th hought of any risk arising in this transction as all security measure has been taken in respect of this transaction.However considering te fact that we want get this fund out before the conclusion of the present election that is going on in the country and the subsequent handover of government to the new government we have deceided to concceed to your insistence in your 30% demand but the most important thing is for you to give your utmost assistance to see to the very urgent and smooth conclusion of this transaction and to be straight forward with us as not to sit on our fund when you finally claim it.You should go ahead and forward the requested information to enable us commence without further delay.Awaiting your very urgent response with the required information.

 Thanks and God bless

 Benny

 P.S. Note that I have to send this mail through my yahoo account because I had little problem accessing my lycos account please bear with me and reply to this email until lycos improves. Thanks for your understanding.

 

OK, Benny.  At 30% we have a deal.  I look forward to working with you on this project and I assure you, I will not sit on the funds once they come through.  Please send me the appropriate paperwork, etc., and we can begin.

Here’s to a mutually profitable relationship.

Louie

 

Dear Louie,

I have received your mail and will commence the processing of the paperwork that will enable you claim this fund on my behalf as soon I receive the required following information from you.(1)Your full name and address (2)Your private phone and fax numbers which I will forward to the attorney for the procurement of the documents. However you can reach me on my private phone number 234-80-371-XXXXX for more clarification. Awaiting your urgent response with the enclosed informations.

Thanks and God bless

Benny

 

Benny,

I have just recently moved and am in the process of procuring telephone service, which should be switched on at any time now.  I will also be getting a fax line which I will share with my computer.  I am busy unpacking boxes, but I will check my email at the library several times a day until I am set up with my phone/computer lines.

I am eager to begin this transaction with you at the agreed upon 30% of said fund. 

God bless,

Louie

 

Dear Benny,

I just tried to call you at the number you sent and the call did not connect me to you.  Did you send the correct number?  I reread your message and see that you did indeed request my address as well as phone and fax.  I just spoke with the phone company and I am told I will have service this afternoon. 

In the mean time, my address is:  15 Winding Meadowbrook Lane, New York, NY. 10001 Thank you for beginning the process and I look forward to working with you. 

 Sincerely,

 Louie J. Harris 

 

Benny,

I have just spoken to the telephone company and I have been promised that I will have both phone and fax set up first thing tomorrow.  As soon as I get the numbers, I will forward them to you at this email address.

Also, I am going to request that, as a show of good faith on this pending deal, you agree to forward to me an advance of $1,000.00 payable in US Dollars.  This amount will, of course, be deducted from the 30% of fund amount you agreed to.  Though I recognize that you do not have access to the fund yet, this small cash amount would go a long way toward establishing your seriousness to conduct this transaction. 

Please let me know if you agree to these terms, and I will give you the necessary information to complete the transaction.

Sincerely,

Louie

 

Dear Louie,

There is no need wasting my time with someone who is not really out to give me the realistic assistance needed. How can you ask for such money from me knowing after my explaination of the condition of my family. It is absolutely impossible for me to send such money to you.I also understand that you intentionally don’t want to give me all the information required for this transaction, so if you are not really ready  for this transaction with me pleasse for God’s sake there is no need for us to waste our time or do you a hidden agenda?

Thanks

Benny

 

Dear Benny,

I have been open with you.  In less than three hours I will have my new phone and fax in working order.  I have provided my full name and address as you requested.  In the past, when I have executed business transactions, I have been able to procure a small advance to show good faith for returning information necessary to complete the larger transaction.  I do not have a hidden agenda.  If the requested $1000.00 is too much at this time, please let me know and we can negotiate, instead of accusing me of wasting your time.  I am willing to accept a mere $100.00 US dollars from you in advance before embarking on this business venture with you.  Surely this amount is reasonable considering the windfall that awaits us both.  Benny, when this transaction is finally complete, I will fly you to New York and take you to the finest restaurant in the city, with dinner on me.  You will more than recoup your $100.00 investment.  Please let me know if you accept these terms and I will forward you the necessary information.  I look forward to working with you.

Sincerely,

Louie

 

Louie,

What faith are talking about here? Who is suppose to show faith to who? Do you know realise that it is my money that we are talking about putting into your care. As a matter of fact, what you are demanding is not in any way a proceedure for any business execution of this nature and I am ready to waste my time like I told you earlier if you continue to toy around with me  in this proposal. I am not quite disposed with your approach to this transaction.

Benny

Benny,

I have not heard from you in several days.  I have since received my telephone and fax numbers and they are installed and working.  Are you still interested in working together?  I know I can be difficult to negotiate with sometimes, so I hope there are no hard feelings. 

Are you ready to proceed?

Let me know and I will send you the requested information.

Sincerely,

Louie

 

Dear Louie,

Compliments of the season. I have received your mails with full understanding of the contents and I quite appreciate the efforts you are making towards concluding this project.I was not able to mail you this past weekend due to the easter holiday,as christians we asobserved the easter holiday to commerate the death and ressuration of our lord Jesus Christ.I am also happy that you have gotten your phone and fax numbers,send them to me so that we can proceed.However I will apply through the attorney for the processing of the documents of the documents to enable the claims of the fund.Before the procurement of the douments I want to know if you will be able to come to Nigeria for the claims of the fund since it is still lying in Nigeria or do you want the fund freighted to any european office of the security firm where you can conveniently go for the claims of this fund.This is neccessary to enable me know how the movement of the fund will be programmed in the documents of claims.I have now confirm your seriousness in this transaction and is ready to go ahead with you provided you continue with your maximum assistance and I am assuring you that you will not regret doing this business with me.I stop here until I hear from you.

Thanks and remain blessed

Benny

 

Note: After some initial pleasantries, I introduce a completely fictitious character into the picture—a young man who will savagely compete with Benny for the affections of yours truly. 

Dear Benny,

As a Christian myself, I was delighted to hear that you were busy in the celebration of Easter and the resurrection of Jesus Christ, our savior.  I hope your Easter basket was as filled with many goodies from the Easter Bunny!

On to more serious notes, Benny.  I think we may have a bit of a problem here.   I hope you consider this an indication of our mutual trust that I am sharing this information with you at all.  But I do feel that I’ve come to know you a little from our correspondence, and because I believe that honesty is the best policy in business and friendship, I want you to be aware of this new situation.

Benny, I’ll cut to the chase.  Over the weekend, I was contacted by a Mr. Martin Bamaiyi who is apparently trying his best to go behind your back and make a deal with me regarding the money transfer we’ve been working on together.  I was all set to ignore him completely until he offered me 35% of the money and began telling me some very intriguing tales about your personal life.  In short, he said you were not to be trusted and that I was better off taking a larger percentage of the money and dealing with him directly.  It was then that he told me that you were about to be shunned from the family and the deal because of homosexual behavior.  To prove his point, he showed me a website that was designed by your gay lover!

www.Benny.Obaseki.isgay.com (There used to be a website where one could insert any name before “isgay.com” and it would lead to a link where one would be greeted with their name prominently displayed in headlines and stories about their sexual behavior.)

Benny, is this true?  What am I to believe?  Do you know this Martin Bamaiyi?  Before I respond to him, I feel I owe it to you to at least hear your version of events.  I am eager to do this transaction, but the confusion and personal attacks are making me wary.  However, I will wait until I hear from you before I respond to Mr. Bamaiyi’s proposal.

Thank you,

 

Louie

 

Note: Remarkably, Benny admits to an evil brother named Martin!

 

Dear Louie,

I received your mail with full happiness and understanding of the contents.I am very happy because of the infomation you gave to me.That goes a long way to tell me that I have gotten the right partner who is

very reliable to conclude this transaction with me.I am saying this because if you are not reliable you wouldn’t have even informed me of this latest development not to think of still having the interets of continuing in this transaction.First of all in the African context you know there is this envieness among brothers even of the same family,there is this struggle for superiority and who occupies what positon in the family.The whole thing you were told by my kid brother is complete lie and an attempt to assasinate my character and to use it as an opportunity to deceive you as to dubiously victmise you.You know that in the African context the first and the eldest son is the head of the family when their father is not around or death and by tradition the heir apparent of the father’s belongings.By virture of this position no other person has the right to handle the family business except the fisrt and the eldest son of the family which is me and that is what gave me the privellege to contact you for this transaction based on my father’s will.In a nut shell this kid brother of mine is only being envious of my position and therefore trying a way to get information from you to help him carry out his evil plans on you.I am advicing you as matter of fact to please ignore him and what ever offer he is giving to him for your own good.He has no say in this transaction and therefore has nothing to offer you as far as this transaction is concerned.You should know that no gennuine person will offer you this kind of bogus % from a family business if not for mischievous reasons.The web site he sent to you was deliberatley opened by him to perpetrate his evil plans and it is complete lies.I am a complete christian and cannot in any way be a gay.I sway with the Almighty God I worship that all what he said about me is lie I am not a gay and he is not in any way connected to this transactrion,he is only a prodigal son who is trying to look for an opportunity to dupe an innocent person,please do not respond to his evil mails he mean evil for you.Just send to me the phone and fax numbers I requested from you for us to proceed.The bible tells me that our body is the temple of God and therfore we should keep it holy.So it is morally and spiritually wrong if I should go into such immoral acts.God will not be happy with me.I await your response to enable us proceed.Note that we are going forward on the aggreed 30%,anything outside this is fraud and you should be careful.

Thanks and be blessed.

Yours GOD FEARING BENNY

 

God Fearing Benny,

Thank you for writing back to me.  I was unsure if the shame and indignity of having your name go out all over the internet as a sexual deviant might drive you into seclusion and I was worried about you.  I was sorry to be the one to make you aware of this, but I thought something was horribly afoul in the Obaseki family and I thought I owed it to you to inform you.

First of all let me offer you my condolences regarding your evil brother, Martin.  I am sure his wicked ways have caused you and your family no amount of stress and pain.  I can’t imagine having such a despicable sibling as Martin, who would attempt to cut you out of our budding partnership by smearing your good reputation with lurid accounts of your sexual preferences.   I hope the two of you do not share a room together. 

And secondly, here in America, we are far more tolerant of alternative sexual behavior, Benny.  Many Christians in America are homosexuals.  Some of our biggest movie stars are gay.  In fact, there was once a US President who had slaves, (gay slaves) and I believe they traveled with him on Air Force One.  My point is that you need not go out of your way to hide whatever sexual tendencies you might have, Benny.  It’s none of my business.  I don’t want to waste another minute on an issue that has clearly brought shame and scandal on the Obaseki family, causing a rift so deep and dividing that two brothers, who once probably laughed together and chased each other in the Nigerian meadows and shared sweets at Six Flags are now at one another’s throats.  It saddens me deeply.

I hope you do not mind the intrusion, but I spoke to Martin on the telephone and I told him directly that what he did to you was mean, callous and insensitive.  I said that I could not trust someone who would release a family secret about one’s own brother for all the world to see.  I think Martin understood and was sorry after what I told him.  He said he was going to smooth things out with you and apologize and he agreed to work together with you on the transaction for the sake of the family.  I would not be surprised if the two of you have spoken by the time you read this email. 

Benny, please let me know if you don’t believe Martin is sincere.  He sounds trustworthy now and I believe him when he tells me he will talk to you about this and work with you now.  But I want to hear it from you before we proceed so I know that Martin is not lying again.  He said he will call me after he talks to you, but after what he did to you, I’m not sure I fully trust him yet. 

Best,

Louie

 

Louie,

Like I told you before now that I don’t have much time to waste in this issue.The time we have waisted already is enough for us to conclude this transaction if had complied by giving me all the information I needed from you.Now there are some complicating behaviour of yours which makes begin again to doubt your seriousness in this deal.I have been begging you for your tel and fax numbers which you refuse to send but from yuour mail you said you have giving it to Martins,again I gave you my phone numbers to call but you have not done so but again you have called martins.I know when I am being fooled and I have told you the truth of the matter between martin and myself,wether American christians involves in homosexual activities or not is not my concern that is American cultuere and mentality for you,it is not like that in Africa and can never happen in my family.I don’t like someone playing over my intelligence and this thing have drawn for so long.You keep giving one excuse or reason after the other.The truth is that if you don’t believe me as to continue in this transaction with me and if you fail to send your phone and fax numbers I will leave you to deal with Martin and will look for another person since I discovered that you are more interested to deal with him but at the end we will know who is telling the truth.If after receiving this mail you fail to send your phone and fax numbers for us to proceed then don’t worry about sending any mail to me just forget the whole thing.

Thanks and God bless

BENNY

 

Who is this?  Is this Martin or Benny?

Benny has my numbers because he just called me!

Martin, leave me alone.  I know it’s you.  I’m emailing Benny at his new email address from now on.

Good bye. 

 

LOUIE,

YOU ARE NOT SERIOUS.WHEN YOU ARE SERIOUS I WILL KNOW.FOR NOW I AM LOOKING FOR SOME ONE ELSE WHO IS SERIOUS.

BENNY

 

Who is this?  I have been speaking to the real Benny on the telephone who has a new email address.  Benny has told me he will not use this old email address anymore.  So who is this emailing me?  I am not interested in working with anyone else on this deal.  Thank you. 

 

Louie,

Be seriouys for once in your life.I am Benny obaseki bamaiyi who started with you on my very first email address benny.obaseki@xxxxx.co.uk before the  email had problem which made change to

bennyobaseki2002@xxxxx.co.uk.I gave you my phone number to call me but instaed you keep telling one story or another.Please do not be deceived by any one due to ignorant.My phone number is 234-80-3715-XXXX,so if you are serious call me tommorrow or else you will regret anything you are doing with who ever that is impersonating me at the end of it all.Please stop further communication with any impersonator so that you don’t cry at last.I will for you to call me tommorrow if not I will get another person to do this  transaction with and leave you to deal with that  impersonator and at the end you will see the result of your unbelive.I am awaiting your call and response if you are serious.

Benny obaseki Bamaiyi

 

Excuse me?  Do you think I am not smart enough to figure out who the imposter is here when I have both brothers claiming the other is a fraud!  I have received official documents now from the Bamaiyi family authorizing me to take control of these funds, so I am quite sure I have the correct contacts.  I have no more time for this charade.  I have spoken to the real “Benny” now who has shown me autographed photos of General Abacha to prove the Bamaiyi family connection, and I am confident this transaction will be completed shortly.  As Martin has correctly stated, to identify the imposter, make note of inconsistencies such as name changes (Bamaiyi to Obaseki) and email changes (lycos to yahoo) and telephone numbers that do not work.  Also I have received written and notarized approval of a 33% share of the fund, something you have said was impossible.  After a few details are taken care of, this transaction will be complete. Good day.  

 

Go ahead and do your wish.No problem but you will cry at the end. Stop mailing me.I am no longer interested in doing anything with you.You are nothing but some one who have all the time on earth to waste on the internet.

Bye

 

Fine.  Best of luck to you.  It is you who will be crying.  I’m about to become rich!  Bye.

 

One week later…

 

Benny,

I need your help.  I am so stupid.  You tried to warn me but I made the mistake of believing Martin and he has robbed me!  Benny, I don’t know what I can say to you and do not blame you if you have a great laugh at my expense.  You were right.  I am crying in the end. 

I do not know what to do.  I sent payment of $4,501.65 US Dollars to Martin via Western Union in Lagos.  I was promised immediate transfer of funds and now I’m being told that there are federal taxation issues! Benny, at this point I just want my money back.  I don’t want to be rich anymore.  Is there anything you can think of that I can do?  I have money, but not enough to be throwing over $4,000 around without it hurting me. 

I understand if you are laughing very hard at me for being a rude and stupid American.  And I don’t blame you if you decide not to do anything.  But I am begging you.  You tried to warn me about your kid brother, and I didn’t listen.  Now I am ruined.  Please, if there is anything you can do to help, please, please let me know.  Martin is no longer answering my email and his number does not work.  I don’t know what to do. 

Sincerely,

Louie

 

Louie or what do you say your name is, If what you are saying is true,let me see the prove of the money you sent to Martin via western union.What I mean is the payment details of the money you sent to

Martins and once I confirm it I will advice you on what to do.If you fail to do so I will take you to be one of those people who have nothing to do but have all the time on earth to spend on the internet.

Benny

 

I scan a Western Union receipt and send it to Benny as proof of my transaction with his evil brother Martin, but I never hear back from Benny.  Though I do still receive requests to help claim fortunes in Nigeria from time to time.